21st July, 2007
Rocks Fall, Everybody Dies
Saturday, 3:46 pm in Books & Comics
Ho, crap it’s the Potterdammerung!
So. Last Harry Potter book, leik, evah and let the wank flow free! Because apparently, it’s total crap.
You know what? I don’t like J.K. Rowling. I think she’s a terrible author and always have. Yeah, she lucked out on the kind of no-consequences wish-fulfilment adventure story that everyone loves, but as far as I’m concerned I can write these myself and technically and stylistically JKR isn’t anything to sing about. There are a lot of better authors out there, including in her own genre; you don’t need to go trawling through ‘literature’ to find them. But whatever, none of that matters, and none of that is what’s currently making me feel morally superior. ‘Cause yeah, I’m loving the schadenfreude right now. Not because people think the book is bad (of course it was going to be bad; the woman can’t write her way out of a plot hole), oh no no.
I’m currently feeling morally superior because a bunch of rabid fans built a mediocre author up onto a pedestal and they’re now having their dreams smashed. Oh yeah, that’s the sweet stuff.
Thing is, I bet that the book’s not that terrible. There are going to be a lot of fans out there who will read it, mildly enjoy it, then forget about the whole affair. It happens. But I do like to see all those shrill fangirls/-boys threatening internet suicide because it’s suddenly occurred to them that they’ve wasted the last ten years of their lives (hint: you have not).
So it is to you people that I say a big Puritan HA! HA!. Enjoy the end of your worlds.
Also: Albus Severus and Scorpius Malfoy are so totally everyone’s next OTP.
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Comments
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I’ve always preferred Roald Dahl’s writing style myself.
I’ve heard that the ending was great, but the epilogue is total shit.
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Do I detect a hint of jealousy there?
Nah, actually you’re right…JK Rowling is not a brilliant writer. I’m not going to say I can write better, but to those who say ‘omg she’s THE best writer EVER!’ - she isn’t. What she does have though is an amazing imagination and storytelling ability. She tried for years to get HP published until she got lucky. She was in the right place at the right time, but in all honesty she’s got so many kids interested in books and if people are queuing round blocks to get hold of a book to read, then I salute her.Being a spoilsport, I read the final pages. Gah! Don’t want to read it the rest of it now
To be honest though, the only concern I had was that of Rita Skeeter; if she died, I’d seriously be upset. No suicide, but time off for bereavement. Totally. That woman is my world.
Think she’s okay though
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What she does have though is an amazing imagination and storytelling ability.
Have to disagree with you there, to be honest. There’s nothing really in HP that we haven’t seen in various other genre stories before. She’s definitely not original, definitely not technically skilled and her grasp of characterisation and plot development is flimsy and facile. Authors like Diana Wynne Jones, Robin Jarvis, Terry Pratchett, Kirsten Miller, Neil Gaiman and Tony DiTerlizzi/Holly Black are all writing contemporary children’s books in the genre-space, and I’d be willing to get into a stand-up fight over all of these authors being better than JKR.
JKR is definitely more successful, but she’s not – from a technical standpoint – better. My own personal pet theory about her popularity is that it’s because she’s somewhat mediocre that she’s popular; there’s nothing in the HP series that is in any way morally or intellectually challenging. It contains an obvious dichotomy between who is ‘good’ and who is ‘bad’; even if the ‘good’ characters do bad things (or vice-versa) they’re still ‘good’ because that’s just the way the universe works. Bad characters do not have particularly complex motivations over what they do (they’re racist, they’re greedy) and they usually acknowledge at least tacitly that they are evil (‘Dark Wizards’). They are usually easily recognisable. But the thing that really gets me – but what I think is appealing to most other readers – is that there are almost zero consequences for anything. This is that whole wish-fulfilment thing. The Terrible Trio spend thousands of pages nosing into other people’s business and making a mess and no-one ever says (or if they do, they’re evil and not taken seriously), “Hang on, what makes you so special that you can get away with this?” Neither Harry, Ron or Hermione is particularly talented or clever (Hermione reads a lot of books, which apparently makes her ‘smart’; give me a break!), so they’re excellent stand-ins for the readers who are also likely to be not particularly talented or clever.
That’s the main difference, I think.
Harry Potter: It’s like Big Brother for reading.
Do I detect a hint of jealousy there?
Damn right you do! For myself and for every other struggling author out there.
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‘But the thing that really gets me – but what I think is appealing to most other readers – is that there are almost zero consequences for anything.’
Now this I agree on. Completely.
The thing is, I hate Harry Potter. Sounds silly, but I can’t stand the character. Never have done. He was okay in book one, but each time the group seems to get away with things and be hailed heroes for what THEY got themselves into in the first place…only for Harry to pull the ‘but I don’t WANT to be famous!’ card. ‘I don’t want to be a hero! MY PARENTS WERE MURDERED!’
No wonder Draco et al picked on him. Goody-goodies were picked on at my school, too.
It’s something that has riled me throughout the whole series, as mundane as it sounds. Therefore the issue of whether he lived/died really didn’t bother me.
JK may not be the best, I know that but still appreciate her work. In my opinion her break was just a matter of luck.